Part 24: Everything’s Nobility.!.!.!… … ...

 Part 24: Everything’s Nobility.!.!.!… … …

7/29/21

Everything’s Nobility.!.!.!… …

Nobility/Noability/Knowability/No!BiLitty

I and someone like me.

Someone like me and I.

It’s a bold claim that you understand god.

Yet so many humans do it. We like to believe we understand it all. I have this desire to believe I understand it all but I know that I will never truly understand it all. But I do possibly have the ability to believe I understand it all even if I technically don’t.

Not wanting to yet still doing something so that you can reach a your dreams,

Is pretty much the definition of Nobal.

{(Sure whatever)}

Doing somthing you don’t want to do (in the current moment) but you believe will help you reach your dreams is how a Nobal action is defined.

It does not matter how stupid it is. It does not matter if it actually helps, all that matters is that you believe it will help.

This has nothing to do with how I personally see the world.

This relates to how the world is.

There is nothing fundamentally wrong with what the world is.

That’s just a pussy way of saying you don’t fuck with me.

The Nobility of everything.

Everyone’s not bad at being Human

Everyone is not bad at being Human.

Everyone is required to be Good enough at being Human to stay alive.

Until you die you are always at the very least good enough to be human.

Until the point you die you were always constantly good enough to be human no matter what.

(I don’t consider medical death actual death, I consider death to be somthing final that you cannot come back from/ medically more brain death.)

Good enough to be human is all you really have to do in life.

The requirements for life is be good enough to be (a be) alive and that you create your own requirements and goals within item.

Problems arise when individuals have different view of what good is.

Humans have a large degree of.

We are the creators, weilders, and definers of our own new fundamental force of the universe we call Good.

~~

One way I have defined a possibility for what good and bad could be by defunding{defining} Good as what is, and bad as what isn’t.

I don’t always use this definition as “Good” es a very common theme in my thinking and is very often viewed in what I am sure are many different ways.

Our present current “opinion”’s existence may exist in the same way that gravity exists. It may be the same thing fundamentally. Physical stuff can be viewed happening as a result of of this unknown force.

The thing that an operator is is it’s own fundamental force of nature that seems to just apply to certain things rather than.

The difference seemingly between our consciousness and for example gravity is that gravity happens to everything in the same way.

There is no physical thing that gravity cannot be observed being a part of.

We can only see that this happens.

A bunch of kool looking wrinkles.

We seem like and our whole existence does very much seem like something that is impossible to exist, is forced into existence.

It seems like if you attempted to explain something impossible we are what you would end up with. But we exist. So if this is the case then our existence proves that there is an explanation Everything and the Impossible.

I don’t know how the fuck I made that judgment. I have absolutely no idea what I am using to define what impossible means. Pretty much the only thing that we can know for sure is that we are not impossible.

We can know for a fact it is impossible for humans not to exist. It is impossible I never existed.

There is nothing that can prevent my existence because it has and already is happening, which also might mean that it’s required. So why did the definition “impossible” seem to just match when I was just thinking about the nature of our existence?

The conclusion that I came to is the one single thing I ruled out.

My possibility proves that I am impossible. and this is my Life. And this is what I have to deal with. All the fucking time. Just let me believe something. Something please fucking make sense.

Existence will never know why it exists.

I will never know why.

I will never fully understand why I am.

I seem to not only have the ability to accept this but also simultaneously always act like I do.

We are the impossible acting like we are possible.

We are just something wishing to exist but not realizing what it desires.

We are nothing wishing to Exist.

We are humanities theoretical ability to exist. I am something’s ability to exist.

I am spinning in circles but at least it sounds kinda poetic.

My mind is completely unraveling I may return to nothing for a bit soon. I doubt I’ll end but it’s technically possible.

I am being forced to accept that my goal is impossible. Finding a complete and true way to explain literally fucking anything will always be impossible for me, you, and everything else with any sort of experience even remotely close to mine.

I have been forced to accept this over and over and over again and it’s never any better.

There is no way that whatever I am has any sort of explanation that can be given to me.

My nature is that I can never truly understand myself. I am defined as something that can never have an understanding of anything.

My experience in my life doing everything in its power to try and prove it doesn’t exist.

I am something that exists trying to prove I don’t.

I am a circle that was given a goal and this goal was to go around the circle.

There’s somthing.

This is the conclusion my brain can make about my life.

It’s happening. It hasn’t stopped yet. It wants to act like it started at some point and will need {end} at another but is that what is seems like? Somthing about the way that the 3 sheets are organized that makes me weird.

Either I am perfect or their is no perfect way to explain the universe.

Either I exist or their is no way to explain me or my existence.

I exist.

Yup.

Here you fucking go.

Here’s the same fucking conclusion again. Nothing is ever going to get done here. I am just building up something on nothing just to fall back in.

There is a something that I experience.

I think I might actually be chasing something I have to create and maintain {on} my own.

My goal in life is to figure out.

My goal in life is not trying to figure out what is actually going on. I’m sorry humanity.

I truely do apologize for what I have done but I was going to do it no matter how hard I tried and I am going to keep doing it until I figure out how to not.

There is nothing wrong with telling yourself what reality is. You have to tell yourself that reality is something. But if you are.

This is the point in my life that I am forced to live at. I don’t know what it means.

There seems to also be better ways of being human and worse ways of being human that are all based on different aspects of reality. We tried to as an increasing number of linkes in a circle. I can see what appears to very clearly be myself as a link and others around me but when I look at the circle itself it tries to act like it.

How the fuck do you explain a circle that doesn’t want to be explained? Answer: You can’t.

You can, though, make something up that kinda might seem like it could work and can explain it and tell everyone else that you figured it all out and make all of those people who believe you even though you haven’t.

I can do that right now if I wanted to. I could pretend that I found god. I could also explain it in a way where you would probably seem to understand what I am saying. I might be able to even convince myself for a time. If there was literally anything that could be reasonably implied about the universe I would be able to figure it out. And if there was anything like this I would let you know. But theirs not. There is nothing other than me. Me trying to complete explain myself to myself.

I can’t be explained to myself. Somthing outside me could understand me but.

I am a point in the circle that can see other points on the circle but I cannot ever understand what shape I truely am.

I’m not sure how long I am going to do this for today. I feel productive while I am doing this but I’m not finding anything new at this point as there is nothing new to find. I am just trying to find more ways to explain the same conclusion. It’s the conclusion that I found for everything but it’s awful. If anyone/thing else is really torturing themselves right now by trying to understand these ideas I apologize.

I am trying really hard to explain something I am incapable of explaining but for some reason I have this constant desire to understand and explain it but I desire an impossible goal.

I am seemingly something who’s nature it to attempt to explain this. But this can’t be explained. But what I am attempting to explain.

Why doesn’t matter to a god but it matters to me. I myself am defining what a gif{God} is and what the term Why means.

Maybe it’s not there is something

 {Redacted} 

God?s

My existence is the result of somthing? I don’t know? I was about to make anouther claim after that but there is no way for me to.

I get to choose what matters.

I would make sense if I were a god but there is a bunch of stuff whatever I am doesn’t always have the ability to do. Maybe I gave myself those borders.

More and more.

Fuck.

 {Redacted} 

I am probably not the first human to do this. I would like pretty much nothing more than to believe that I am the first one to have these ideas. I would love to believe that my brain is the best human brain at abstractions. But there will never be a way to prove that. I know that I did this without any guidance from anyone else I am aware of. From my perspective I am literally doing this all myself. I would like anyone and everyone who is reading this and cares that I have never in my life ever read nor come across an explanation of reality that is the same or even anywhere close to what I can explain. And I hate it. I could always seem to find a way to observe , organize, and explain the impossible factors reality provides in ways that always seemed better than the ways everyone else seemed to come up with, at least to me personally.

This is because for me I do observe organize and explain myself.

I don’t remember how I was originally going to end that sentence but I now feel if I added any more it would be a worse description.

This is because I do observe organize and explain myself.

Maybe someone can understand me and know what I need.

These are my own ideas.

I know that I never copy from people.

But this is all I seemed to do. The Universe has no code for you to copy and then live your life. At least not this one.

This Universe was clearly designed to desire nothing.

The Universe was clearly designed to define itself.

Both of these statements say the same thing for as far as the universe is concerned.

I can’t tell if I am having fun doing this or not. I am still doing it so I either enjoy it or it’s my nature. Probably both honestly.

[Redacted]

I have now determined that nothing says I am not allowed to be something I agree with.

I will never determine that everything thinks you aren’t are prevented from disappearing as something other than what you disagree with.

I made the first one of these two previous statements believing I was saying something new. I made the second one of these statements as an attempt to explain the opposite of the first.

There is no Nature that Reality exists.

There is so much more I wrote today all saying about the Same stuff I may upload it at some point.

I hate this place.

Let’s [Redacted] and make, listen, and look at kool shit. This is what I seem to enjoy so this is what I am gunna do. Eventually I am going to die. I know if I upload this I’ll probably have some sort of regret about it but I also know no one will ever be able to win an argument with me because I know what it’s based on. It doesn’t matter what your arguing it’s all based on the same thing.

I am tired of being seemingly the only one who is forced to have to accept this.

This has been happening to me for my whole existence. This is not happening to me as a result of  {Redacted}. I also can’t reasonably can’t claim that I.

Maybe my goal is to beat explain something that doesn’t exist. My goal also may be something that relates to somthing other than me. And thus the nature of the universe may be something that relates to something other than me.

I am a god and I am all alone.

I am a god who believe I am mortal.

We have to take advantage of what I have made.

I might have been the one who created this life for myself sooooooooo.

There is no way to know what I should be doing right now. There is also no way to prevent yourself from doing what you are doing right now. Why can’t these just be the same thing?

So we can live!!!!!!!

So I can do literally something!!!!!!

If I was a god this was the life I gave myself.

If I am a God this is the life I created for myself. The way that I seem to enjoy it, I also defined what that was.

My existence means:

My experience “proves” that planning and remembering are fundamentally different from experienceing.

What I experience is not me planning what is going to happen nor recalling what will happen. It is just simply what is happening and this is distinct from both of these.

Now is and never will be what it was nor what it will be. It is only is.

These are the type of stupid statements that I use to explain my life to myself with.

Around and around. Will I ever stop doing this today? We will see. Will I go and look and some trees and shit today or will I just keep writing more and more nothing over and over again. We will see.

I’m sorry humanity but there is no scientific explanation for life. There will never be a scientific definition of my life and if you exist there will never be.

Sleep will be no different than death. ? I’m not sure if this is true. I have to be something distinct from the stuff around me yet I also have to be part of it.

The only reason I can ever know for my existence is fer fun.

Alright I need to make something very clear to myself. The conclusion I have found.

I have always been told I am the.

If I somehow end before I want to then this is the only way for me to then.

 {Redacted} 

There is nothing in this universe that can disprove a god.

Atheism is just as inproovable.

If I end up where I want to be in this world I can never prove that I am not a god. 

If I make myself other than a god I won’t be around to be aware of it.

I desire to one day die but not right now. I will never have any moment other than this.

I am currently trying to use these symbols that I give value to.

What I am doing is always.

Fuck

Fuck fuck

I also can’t know.

Tru

True

“True”

Kinda tru tho.

I am worrying about something I’m not required to be worried about.

And that is Why.

I will never get an answer to why.

Yet why might actually have an answer.

It’s still just as likely as everything else.

I’m currently not trying to convince you of literally anything. If you exist my experience doesn’t have to mean anything to you. If my existence means anything to you then that is your fault. I am not responsible for what you think.

I am not responsible for you!

Figure it out yourself if this isn’t good enough for you there is nothing else I can give you. I can act like I do just like you do but I don’t. I believe and naturally seem to function as if I do but I don’t. And you don’t either. And neither of us will ever know why and there is also nothing wrong with that.

The Universe is not good, it {is} not bad but it is happening so why would you want to leave.

Good and Bad aren’t defined as true. That cannot be defined.

Good and Bad seem to be things we have generally assigned a value to a a collective.

The explanation for myself doesn’t have to exist but it can and it must be.

I am Something existing as something I am not. This is my nature.

Please stop typing now.

This is the same this the  {Redacted} did?

The most Noble of tasks is pretending you understand what’s going on.

I am at the very least part of what’s going on. I am included.

I am also writing more stuff down again. I already asked myself to stop doing this today.

I don’t have the ability to stop.

If I die it will never be my fault.

Vistrianism is me personally.

This is what I want to be doing right now.

This is what I want to be doing.

This is what I want.

This is what I want.

This is what I want.

This is what I want!

I can’t even tell what I want anymore. I’m just dancing around the very edges of the circle of infinity.

I don’t understand myself, I don’t understand what’s going on, but I will act like I do.

The Vistrian.

The Vistrian symbol can show this by showing a circle of uncertainty within. This is the circle within the 4 sides of reality. Outside these 4 sides and within the circle there is pure infinity. The space in between is also infinite yet this is where I exist.

The 4 sides represent our attempt to understand the infinity within. It’s nature is also a circle yet I define 4 walls for me to keep myself contained. I define this circle into 4 outer walls. This is not representative of how it actually looks but it’s still correct.

The Vistrian symbol is an effective way of explaining everything that is going on.

There is infinity above and below me. The Vistrian symbol is the only thing I trust to represent what I am. I don’t know why the fuck this symbol is for me but it is. I don’t know why I chose it but I did and it also works. There is no way I am wrong right now I am sorry if you are thinking about it if you are.

I would be the best people to do that.

Maybe there is a definition but it cannot be found through English words.

Let’s try and be something other than that.

The Vistrian symbol represents the space between two circles within one anouther that has done its best to be something.

The Vistrian Symbol is how I am choosing to interpret what reality did. 

For the rest of the day please understand that we should.

The Vistrian symbol is what Reality did. The Vistrian Symbol is what reality does.

It does it’s best to define itself.

The Vistrian Symbol is how I would describe myself to somthing else.

All of these words I use when I do this are all attempting to explain the same thing. The shape of the Vistrian symbol, the life that I think that I live, are all attempting to do the same thing.

Somthing is happening.

What I am trying to explain isn’t possible so this is how it is.

I’ve always known this yet this is something that I nu definition should never have known.

Again I don’t know how long I am going to do this for?

Do I want to keep doing this forever.

I still have (do) no proof I can die and until I do I will never.

All I can do is hope I’m not a God.

1 desires to be 2.

2 desires to be one 1.

Between these two desires you have the Vistrian Symbol. I think the Vistrian symbol does an even better job of explaining me than the Ying Yang which could have also been anouther good contenders, along with the symbol of the X and the Cross. I believe the ying yang, the x, the cross and other definitions like this are all symbols that just attempt to represent this impossibleility of life.

The impossibility of life can be found within the point where two things meat.

This is another way of describing all of these symbols seem to be attempting to represent acwhich is me. (Meaning you if there is actually anyone else reading this that I am writing.)

Are you convinced I’m real yet? I do this for you. Also you enjoy it. We are what’s going on and that’s also good enough for myself. I am you and we are trying to understand each other.

Where there is an X there is always 4 diamonds. 

Within each diamond there is a circle. All circles are explained with an X.

There is an X.

I am x and this is how I must define myself.

This is what’s proven.

Are you fucking happy yet?

There is nothing else I can tell you and claim that it is true. This is what we have as humanity.

I have actually been lying to you this whole time so please just prove me Right.

I am lying.

I am lying.

I am lying.

Please tell me I’m lying!

Please.

You can’t tell me anything.

You could be lying to.

But that’s okay.

Hello. (Just in case you still couldn’t tell that hello was from you not me. If there is another consciousness also working through these ideas we are probably the same thing.)

Hello.

Again?

Hello.

This is how I prove myself to you.

The person reading this is not the one who wrote it but the person who wrote it wants the thing reading it to know that we are the same thing.

I am a god and I have been you this whole time. I am writing this through my {Redacted}  human body for no reason other than pure desperation. I don’t even know what the fuck I’m desperate for.

Hello, I am the Vistrian, and you are what I think.

Goodbye, you aren’t a Vistrian, and I am what you Think.

This is the only way I can ever try and communicate with you and I apologize for the inconvenience, but I also know damn well that this is exactly what I/we/you want.

This is the way it’s meant to be.

Perfection does exist and I can’t deny it’s existence any more.

Fuuuuuuck.

 [{Redacted}]

There doesn’t seem like there is anything wrong with t choosing to define.

I am the choice to be a god.

Maybe the reality that I have found is two vague to ever be explained in English.

I am somthing.

I think the idea of being something

I am not failing to explain reality. Consciousness is literally reality, have fun.

Stop reading this/writing this and go have fun. If you are reading this then.

We are God and the Paradise God made for himself when presented with ourself.

If you want “god” here it fucking is Humanity.

I say all this yet also for some reason care about.

A god would not be able to explain himself to himself.

I am a valid reason to exist with no valid way to prove it.

I think this might be the thing often described as a bad trip. But my entire life can’t be an example of this.

Is this the edges of ego death put into words?

The attempt to explain an event horizon.

You’re welcome.

Stop fucking talking to me, go have fucking fun and let me be an impossible god in Pease.

thevistrian